It’s back to school season, which means department stores nationwide are hawking their moderately priced wares on television around the clock. I’ve learned to tune out almost every commercial without a jingle worth learning, but one of J.C. Penney’s back to school commercials happened to catch my eye this year and I was very disturbed by one of its plot points.
I’m fully aware that I do a lot of complaining on my blog, and in life, but I swear my beef with this insane commercial is legit. Let’s go through the the story line of one of the clips, as I understand it, and you can see for yourself.
It starts off normal enough—a hot broad doing some laundry. As she’s laundering her spiffy duds that she no doubt purchased from J.C. Penney, she looks up to notice a handsome man at the next drier. She looks intrigued, but there’s nothing in that look that suggests she knows her fellow laundry doer.
He’s obviously caught the eye of the hot lady at the next machine, and now she’s caught his eye. You’ll notice the look of surprise on his face, again indicating that there’s absolutely no chance these two knew each other existed on the same planet before this precise moment in time.
Guess what happens next…
If you guessed they’d be simultaneously putting jeans on, then you were right. But I really can’t imagine anyone who hasn’t seen this commercial guessed that because it’s kind of insane. I mean…why weren’t they wearing pants to being with?
And since when is a laundromat a co-ed dressing room?
You’ll notice the look blurry look of surprise by the man, which I find kind of odd. After all, he was just making eyes at this pantsless woman a second ago. Why would he be surprised now?
Jeezus, these two met about three seconds ago and are clearly ready to jump each other’s bones. I guess it’s a good match—people who do laundry in public without pants should probably stick together.
She’s got all her stuff packed up, buttoned her pants, put her shoes on and is on her way out the door and this guy is still stumbling over his shoes. God knows how long it’ll take him to collect his belongings.
Oh wait—It seems he doesn’t have any other clothes. Which means he was just hanging out at the laundromat bottomless while he washed nothing but his jeans and flirted with the bottomless woman. Seriously, this laundromat is a lawsuit waiting to happen.
And they lived happily ever after.
Just kidding! That guy is chasing down that woman like a lion chases down a gazelle, there’s no way this encounter doesn’t ultimately end with one of them dead. But whatever, it’s not often weirdos find other weirdos who share their weirdo lifestyles. It may have been whirlwind courtship and the relationship will likely end in murder, but I’m happy for them.
If you want to see this morally questionable trainwreck in its entirety, here you go: